Saturday, April 30, 2011

A Requiem for Georgi Gudanov

The deceased GRU Head, Georgi Gudanov, Meg Ryan's Mother



It now appears that, remarkably, the above woman is Georgi Gudanov, who is in fact Meg Ryan's mother. Interestingly, Georgi Gudanov was the head of the Soviet Russian GRU, worldwide, at least to some degree. Georgi Gudanov apparently kept her good looks by going into a "vampire" mode and drinking human blood from her victims. She was allegedly over 1,400 years old at the time of her death. Gudanov was apparently hit by a KGB hit team from Moscow for opposing Social Democracy in America. It is rumored that the head of the World Wide GRU has now shifted to America with a neothomist political agenda, that is, Anthony J. Fejfar's Critical Thomism. Fejfar is recommending that the Preamble to the United States Constitution include an expanded version of the Declaration of Independence, which closely resembles language found in the Pennsylvania Constitution. He also says that there is no reason, economically, that we can have full employment with affordable health and dental insurance, if we use Federal Reserve economic development money to fund volunteer stipends, hobby stipends, supplemental disability checks, education grants and scholarships, and zero interest student loans. This fits with the second idea that we can put in the Preamble of the United States Constitution, namely, To each according to his, her, or hae need, from each according to his, her, or hae ability. This comes from the German Democratic Socialists from the late 19th century, led by Chancellor Otto vonBismarck and the Kaiser, and was quoted by Karl Marx in the Communist Manifesto.




Condolences to Meg Ryan on her mother's death, our prayers are with her.




(C)Copyright (2011) by Anthony J. Fejfar and Neothomism, P.C. (PA)

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The most beautiful thing - Women! (part 1)

We present you the most beautiful girls in the world. There are Top 10 girls in HD pictures. So comment this post, follow us and we will show you more!...






























































































































































































































































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Friday, April 29, 2011

Fejfar Entertainment Blog: The Reincarnational Past Life of Leonardo di Capri...

Fejfar Entertainment Blog: The Reincarnational Past Life of Leonardo di Capri...: "It now appears that Leonardo diCapria had, as his last reincarnational life, the life as farm hand Leonard 'Red' Fejfar, born and raised ar..."

The Reincarnational Past Life of Leonardo di Capria

It now appears that Leonardo diCapria had, as his last reincarnational life, the life as farm hand Leonard "Red" Fejfar, born and raised around Utica, South Dakota. Leonard Fejfar was a war hero who fought with 101st Airborne, the Screaming Eagles at Bastogne. Red Fejfar came back from the War and moved to the Seattle, Washington area and was employed as an electric engineer. Leonard Fejfar died in the early 1980's and reincarnated in the Czech Republic, and then came to the United States as a Czech KGB agent, and met with Russian KGB agents, Tom Selleck and Harrison Ford, and soon they became fast gay boyfriends, and Leonardo DiCapria began his career in Hollywood with the starring role, sinking on the Titanic.
(C)Copyright (2011) by Anthony J. Fejfar and Anthony J. Faber and Neothomism, P.C. (PA)


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BSNYC Friday Superbowl of Ultimate Frisbee!

You know, last time I checked, this was America (or, if you prefer, Canada's cross-threaded bottom bracket shell)--a proud and independent nation that bows to nobody except for the Fortune 500 and China. So you can imagine my consternation when I woke up this morning and turned on the television, only to find that pretty much all of our fine cultural exports (actually, I think TV programming may be our only export at this point) had been pre-empted by a couple of Australian royals getting married. This would never have happened if Jessie Ventura were still governor of Minnesota, and I only hope this country can get back on track before we're all driving kangaroos and speaking Vegemite. Anyway, if I wanted to watch nuptials all day I'd hang out around Grand Army Plaza in Brooklyn and watch people getting their wedding photos taken.

In other news, while I generally avoid "geeking out" over bike stuff on this blog, I find myself compelled to share that I have just made a significant Smugness Upgrade to my Surly Big Dummy by installing an Xtracycle PeaPod LT child-"portaging" seat. Here is my Smugness Flotilla as it looks now:

(Everything about this bike screams "Smugness Noob.")

I know child seats are extremely trendy right now and a lot of people are "running" them on their track bikes just for the good looks, but I can assure you that I actually own a real human child. In fact, yesterday I took my human child on his very first bike ride, and I'm pleased to report that we both enjoyed the endeavor tremendously. Doubtless there are Portlanders who are reading this and scoffing at me for waiting this long and for not duct-taping an infant car seat to my SnapDeck and "portaging" him immediately from birth, but these are coddled people who don't know black ice from black beans, and I preferred to wait until the weather was fair and the kid was no longer small enough to use a helmet as a crib.

Anyway, here's another shot:

Speaking of child-"portaging," I am very much a novice in that department, and the experience was profound. Fixed-gear riders speak mystically of a "zen" experience in which they are "totally connected to the bike." Similarly, in riding with a human child, I felt transcendently judgmental and was "totally connected to the Smugness." Whereas ordinarily I only notice the most egregious infractions by other road users, with a child on my bike I could now detect them with superhuman accuracy. If a driver five blocks away failed to signal, I knew it; if a car passed me going a single mile-per-hour over the speed limit, I felt a tingling at the nape of my neck; if a stray cat so much as looked at me askance, I fingered my can of Puss-B-Gon and braced myself for impending attack. (Though arguably if you want to drive "pussy" away then an Xtracycle with a child seat on it is all the repellent you need.) I felt more self-righteous than I ever had before, and when I realized that this is how the average person in Portland feels every single day the revelation nearly blew my mind.

Here's the PeaPod LT from the back:

Notice it looks almost exactly like Dark Helmet from "Spaceballs:"

And here's a closer view from the front:

My human child was very comfortable in it and it was very straightforward to set up and use, though I confess I did find the foot restraints disconcerting, but only because they made me think of an electric chair. Still, it's better than the kid going all Nü-Fred fakenger and kicking out some driver's side-view mirror. Really, the only problem now is I have less non-human hauling capacity, which means if I want to carry lots of non-living crap again I need to purchase more Xtracycle accessories, thereby getting sucked into a sickening Smugness Upgrade spiral from which there is surely no escape.

Speaking of no escape, New York City is so profoundly bicycle-unfriendly these days that even people who can't ride their bikes safely because there are no bike lanes don't want bike lanes, as evidenced by this article which was forwarded to me by a reader:

Do we in Bay Ridge really hate bikers? Are we primitive antediluvians who reject any mode of travel not propelled by a combustion engine? Of course not!

Biking here is great, especially along the Shore Road Narrows Promenade. Spectacular! I have two bikes, but find it impossible to ride safely along local avenues because they were not constructed to accommodate designated bike lanes in the first place!


Right, that makes sense. There are few things sadder than a self-hating cyclist. Plenty of streets weren't designed to accommodate cars either but nobody seems to have a problem with both driving and parking them on those streets. By the writer's logic, we should all be living like Amish people and navigating by candlelight since the city was not originally constructed to accommodate electricity either. It's amazing how selective people are when it comes to reconciling the present with the past. During the Revolutionary War the British came to Brooklyn and beat the crap out of us in the Battle of Long Island, but I bet Charles Otey was still wearing his tiara this morning and kvelling over the royal wedding like every other schmuck in America.

Anyway, from kvelling to kvizzing, I'm pleased to present you with a kvizz. As always, study the wildebeest, think, and click on your ostrich. If you're right you'll know, and if you're wrong you'll see a mini recumbent, forwarded by a reader.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and may the Smug be with you.

Smugly,


--BSNYC/RTMS





1) In addition to a 10mph bicycle speed limit, the Golden Gate Bridge District Operating Commitee is also considering a ban on:





2) This image is from the Rapha website.

--True
--False

(via Ant1)





("I pledge allegiance to the flags...")

3) Which of the following is not a part of the New York City Department of Transportation's "Bike Smart Pledge?"

--"Yield to pedestrians"





4) The makers of the all-wooden "SplinterBike" intend to:






5) If a water bottle is called a "bidon," then a rider with a bicycle-mounted wine bottle should be called a "bidouche."

--True
--False




6) Why is this person wincing?





7) The Travel Channel has announced that it is replacing bicycle messenger reality show "Triple Rush" with the popular Internet series "Pedaling."

--True
--False



***Special Time-Traveling T-Shirt-Wearing Retro-Fred from the Planet Tridork-Themed Bonus Question***

Thermal imaging helps detect:


Kate and William: Are they compatible?


With great eagerness, we all are waiting for the wedding of the decade - the royal wedding of Kate Middleton and Prince William. Before we actually get to see their real wedding on April 29, 2011, let's take a quick analysis of how compatible the two will be. Will they have a successful married life or will they have marital conflicts like Princess Diana and Prince Charles had?


Catherine Elizabeth Kate Middleton would be the first commoner to marry a future king of England since the 1600s. William and Kate have been in a relationship for ten years before they got engaged in October 2010. They started off as friends and let their friendship flourish into romance before eventually deciding to take their relationship to another level.

It's not that their relationship has sailed smoothly all along. They have faced some tensions which led to their break-up in 2007. But, their love is so strong that they rekindled their romance again and are walking down the aisle this year.

Kate Middleton was born on January 9, 1982 and is a Capricorn and Prince William, born on June 21,1982, is a Cancer. As their signs are six months apart, they complete each other and are very compatible. Capricorns are reliable, loyal and there also exists good romantic chemistry between them.

Kate and William have a lot of striking similarities. They are fond of travelling and learning about other cultures. They share the same goals and values and will always stand up for each other. Kate's active, practical and outspoken nature will make watery and emotional William feel revitalized and vibrant. Read More!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Colorful bird illusion | Hidden bird illusion

This repeating pattern of an ornithological variety contains a number of colorful and hidden birds - but exactly how many of each color are there?

Colorful and hidden bird illusion

DRIVER San Francisco - Ubisoft Game

Finally I can show here the trailer of the game I'm working as a Nis Artist. Driver San Francisco, from Ubisoft.

I'm working in cutscenes and cinematics sequences for this great title. Watch the awesome trailer!

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World of online games

Games that can be played online, with the help of the internet are often touted as online games. These games are played with the help of a computer and will require a feasible internet connection. The arena of online games is quite vast and is largely beyond the scope of 500 words, yet the author intents to pen down some of the important aspects of online gaming.

There are many reasons so as to why online games are much preferred to offline games, we shall be looking into some of them too in this article.
There is distinct difference between online and offline games. The world of online gaming is still new to many and many in the developing and under developed nations still resort to offline gaming. In offline gaming the gamer will be challenging the artificial intelligence which has been programmed into the game and in online games the players will be virtually challenging other players. This adds to the realism because other gamers are controlling the other characters and hence the whole procedure will be challenging. This is one of the advantages and this happens to be one of the pioneer reasons for online gaming being much preferred to offline gaming.
Online games are broadly classified into free and paid online games. Free games can be downloaded and played free, while paid games will require you to pay for the downloading and game play process. You will be able to play free in the various online servers that are catering to this niche. Online servers are set up either by the game company or by the players themselves. A good and a reliable internet connection are required for the game play and it is much preferred to have a wired internet connection than a wireless internet connection.
Like the advantages, there are many disadvantages associated with this form of gaming. The main factor that comes into play in here is the addiction problems. Multiplayer online games are addictive in nature, because you are playing with other like humans. Some of the online games will require you t spend money for upgrading in-game activities and you might end up paying for more on those days. These simple marketing tactics are intended to fleece gamers out of their hard-earned money. However, some people have made gaming as their livelihood. They earn money developing and acting as a beta tester for game companies.
Online gaming is not allowed at work places all over the world. People tend to concentrate on such games during their work hours and this should be largely discouraged. Usually there are strict policies with the help of which such activities are always kept under control. Making use of precious bandwidth of the company is not tolerable and various firms resort to laying off such employees. The same can be applicable to children also who are hooked up in online gaming activities, they might ignore their studies and will end up hurting their future.

Interesting real facts


  • No piece of normal-size paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.
  • Blueberry juice boosts memory
  • When cats are happy or pleased, they squeeze their eyes shut
  • The elephant is the only animal with 4 knees
  • Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell
  • Each year, about 500,000 detectable earthquakes occur in the world. About 100,000 of those can be felt and about 100 of them cause damage.
  • The tongue is the only body muscle that is attached from one end only. (Please don't send me corrections to add the penis; the penis is not a muscle).
  • We, as humans, forget 90% of our dreams
  • During thinking, we use on about 35% of our brains
  • The percentage of people dreaming in black and white started decreasing after the spread of color TV
  • Approximately two-thirds of people tip their head to the right when they kiss
  • Just days before the World Cup of 1966 in England, the trophy was stolen and then later retrieved by a dog
  • Some Chinese believe that swinging the arms cures headaches
  • Coffee drinkers have more sex than non-coffee drinkers. They also enjoy it more.
  • The city of Portland in Oregon was named after a coin toss in 1844. Heads for Portland and tails for Boston. 
  • A queen bee lays 1500 eggs a day
  • No president of the United States was an only child for his parents
  • Laughter is a proven way to lose weight
  • Pumice is the only rock that floats in water
  • The African cicada fly spends 17 years sleeping, then wakes up for two weeks, mates and then die.
  • The vibrator was originally used as a medicinal treatment for female "hysteria" during the 19th century
  • Reno, Nevada has the highest rate of alcoholism in the U.S., Provo, Utah, the lowest.
  • The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper. Hemp doesn't contain THC and won't make you high.
  • In ancient Rome, when a man testified in court he would swear on his testicles
  • 80% of all pictures on the internet are of naked women
  • 250 to 300 million cell phones are being used in the U.S.

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Beyond Category: Shock the Monkeys

As I mentioned yesterday, after reading a rave review of the Bianchi Super-Oltre Über-Record Road Bicycle Cycling Machine, I decided I had to have one. Well, I'm pleased to announce I've already taken delivery of my new "steede." Made of special high-modulous or huge-mongulous or whatever-you-call-it-ulous crabon fribé, it is the best cycling bicycle that has ever been made on this or any other planet ever. Here is a picture of it in my living room:
Here's a picture of it in front of the cafe where all the roadies hang out:

And here's a picture of it on top of the hardest climb I've ever done, propped up against a sign that says: "ELEV. 296 FT."


Obviously, the first thing you notice about this cycling bike is that it boasts cutting-edge technology and innovation. Just take a look at this branding:

See, what Bianchi have done here is completely re-engineer the head tube badge and transfer it to the underside of the downtube. This enlarged badge results in branding that is up to 250% more laterally obvious and over 300% more vertically apparent, as measured by the German magazine "Marke Hure." ("Marke Hure" has the most accurate testing methods in the cycling industry, and they test logo effectiveness on highly-calibrated monkeys with disposable income--the closest thing to actual roadies occurring in nature.) While this downtube-mounted oversized headtube badge may not increase actual performance, it will give you a much-needed morale boost as you are passed on sub-300 foot climbs by riders on less expensive bicycles.

But the innovations aren't just skin deep--they even go as far as the copy on the Bianchi website:

A result achieved thanks to the carbon frame fabricated through the innovative X-Tex technology, that increases rigidity while limiting the weight. To push your limit far beyond.

If you're wondering what "X-Tex" is, I consulted a popular search engine and can report to you that it's apparently "Great for use in oil / water separators, stormwater and wastewater filtration systems and water 'polishing' applications." Naturally, these superior filtration qualities also make it ideal for building bicycles. Plus, the highly-calibrated monkeys with disposable income at "Marke Hure" say that "X-Tex" is over 300% more delicious than "Tex-Mex."

At this point you're probably thinking: "Holy crap, did the engineering geniuses at Bianchi come up with all of this themselves?" Of course not. Like all ridiculously expensive bicycle cycles, this was a "collabo:"

In collaboration with specialized companies, Bianchi simulated a structural analysis on carbon products aimed at obtaining, during the design phase, the elements necessary for the correct development of its products.

In other words, it probably came out of the same Taiwanese factory as every other crabon bicycle--though I'm sure the downtube-mounted oversized headtube badge was all Bianchi.

None of this is to say there's anything wrong with Taiwanese bicycles, it's just that $11,000 seems a bit much for some quasi-Italian flair regardless of how "super" the Record is. With that kind of scratch, you could pay eccentric steel-sniffer Dario Pegoretti to make you a frame and experience what it's like to be shouted at and belittled by a true artisan. Of course, buying a custom bike comes with its own set of problems, not least of which is finding appropriately artisanal baubles to bolt onto your artisanal frame, but fortunately one reader tells me you can get a $150 bottle cage that is like a "Samurai sword:"

Yes, it's exactly like a Samurai sword except it's way smaller, isn't sharp, and holds bottles for Freds instead of killing people. I suppose anything hand-crafted in Japan has to be likened to a Samurai sword in the same way that anything made in Italy has to reference "passion," but since this is essentially just a utensil I'd argue it's less like a Samurai sword and more like an overpriced chopstick.

Meanwhile, also further to yesterday's post, a commenter asked:

Anonymous said...

care to comment on the absurdity of limiting bikes to 10mph on the Golden Gate bridge for "safety"?

And then linked to the following article:

(Safety-minded Fred has left the reflectors on his Litespeed.)

If you're unfamiliar with the Golden Gate Bridge, it is a bridge that links the city of San Francisco and the profoundly smug county of Marin, and it also happens to remind me of a Samurai sword, albeit a really big one that spans a large body of water. Anyway, I heard about this proposal during my leave of absence last week, and I would agree that a 10mph speed limit is absurd. However, having ridden over the Golden Gate Bridge a number of times, I would also say that it's like someone took all the most annoying elements of the Brooklyn, Manhattan, Williamsburg, and George Washington Bridges and forced them onto a single path. Freds, tourists, wobbly triathletes... You haven't experienced fear until you've been approached head-on by an oblivious tourist on a rental bike, weaving as he simultaneously smokes a cigarette and attempts to take a photograph of one of the towers, while you brace yourself for a collision that could send you hurtling into the icy waters below. Apparently, though, the owner of the rental bike company resents this indictment of his customers:

Jeff Sears, owner of Blazing Saddles, a bike rental company whose advertising urges visitors to "Bike the Bridge," said it's wrong to demonize a class of bike riders or imply that they shouldn't be allowed access to the span.

"It's not fair to label one group as needing to meet some sort of safety standard of bicycle knowledge to be able to bike across the bridge."


What? How is that not fair? Sure, they shouldn't ban tourists on rental bikes, but I think it's perfectly fine to "demonize" them. Saying it's not fair that they should ride safely is like saying, "It's not fair to need some sort of special knowledge to prepare and serve the potentially deadly Fugu fish." Perhaps Jeff Sears should also open up a bunch of amateur Fugu stands along the span, staffed by idiots with Samurai swords. If the tourists don't kill you, the snack foods will.

But of course the real victims here are riders of tallbikes and unicycles--which, as Cyclelicious reports, could be banned altogether:

Besides the 5 MPH and 10 MPH speed limits, Alta recommends a ban on tallbikes and unicycles because they might tip over the bridge safety railings and fall into the Golden Gate...

That would be a crushing blow to the many thousands of people in Mill Valley who commute into San Francisco every day by unicycle and tallbike. Personally, I think we can reach a compromise, which would go something like this: You're allowed to ride a unicycle or similar circus contraption over the Golden Gate Bridge, just as long as you refrain from juggling while on the span.

But if there's one thing we need less than more tourists on rental bikes, it's more fixed-gear videos--though I do make an exception for filmmakers who push the boundaries of the artform, as in this short film that was forwarded to me by a reader:

FIXED from Tim Whitney on Vimeo.

As you can see, it's sort of a "conceptual meta-edit," and it stars a guy with a pompadour:


Who is being pursued by hipsters with nunchucks:


One of whom has a set of knuckle tattoos which may or may not say "Walk Hard:"

Decidely more traditional and pedestrian is this entry, which I saw on the Trackosaurusrex blog:

Official FIXATION Trailer from Alex Trudeau Viriato on Vimeo.

It touches all the bases, including the crucial explanation of why riding a fixed-gear is a metaphysical experience:

"The bike is aaalways moving. Like, you are the bicycle when you're on a track bike. You're part of it. Your legs are what defines what's happening with the bicycle."

If the bike is aaalways moving, how does he explain the incessant trackstanding? And maybe he's the bicycle when he's on a track bike, but some of us manage to ride our bicycles while simultaneously retaining some sense of individuality and autonomous thought.

There's also the person who answers his own rhetorical question:

Q: "What's it like to be fixed gear, clipped in, riding through traffic in LA?"

A: "I gotta say it's a complete rush."

I will admit that he had me rethinking at least one "fixie" stereotype. Previously I had thought all urban fixed-gear riders were studiously scruffy Bard graduates, but this one looks like he should be playing football for Princeton circa 1932.

Yes, of all the fixed-gear videos I've seen, none of them captures that perfect combination of self-importance and mallification quite like the ones from Los Angeles do. You might remember the film "To Live & Ride in L.A.," and I'm pleased to report that the makers have actually sent me an honest-to-Lobness "press release:"

To Live & Ride in L.A. has been widely received as the freshest movie on fixed-gear culture since Rowe's Fast Friday. Shot entirely on the streets of L.A. To Live & Ride in L.A. has been called an "authentic look into the what, where, and now of aggressive urban biking" by URB Magazine. The film was chosen as official selections at both the 2010 Hawaii International Film Festival and the 2010 Los Angeles Bicycle Film Festival and has toured the world on a screening circuit that included stops in Melbourne, Shanghai, Taipei, Las Vegas, Honolulu, Perth and Adelaide, Australia.

Frankly, I'm not impressed by anything that claims to be the "freshest movie on fixed-gear culture" since the last supposedly "fresh" movie on "fixed-gear culture." That's like saying "Ernest Goes to Jail" was the freshest inept-hillbilly-goes-someplace movie since "Ernest Goes to Camp." Still, that's not stopping them from releasing "exclusive content" like this:



In this particular video, the rider does a footplant and gets like four inches of air:

Now that's what I call "fresh."

By the way, this is the same rider who said "riding an aluminum track bike is more like doing tricks and producing a square feel or something like that and then the steel one would draw a circle."

Between his circles and Pegoretti's smells I'm starting to think these people must drinking LSD-tainted water from their Hattori Hanzo bottle cages.