Friday, November 20, 2009

Off Like A Prom Dress

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Well, I'm all packed up and ready to go. The best part was...I've come to the conclusion that I've been under the weather the past few days (thanks Barbie) but I've been too damn busy to realize it other than for the occasional cold sweats. Not fun...but hey, sh*t has to be done, right? On top of all the packing and what-have-you, I've also been thinking a lot. I typically think a lot...like all the time...but this past week it's been about...well, everything. Obviously I'm a little concerned about the move...and that's to be expected. Obviously help from my family & friends and a lot of research over the past four months or so has helped out immeasurably. However, this week, I was mostly thinking about WHY I was moving to Lake Tahoe.

As you may know from reading this blog for a few years (I'm sure there's one or two of you out there), my family is very important to me. My parents are amazing...but then again, what else would you expect from Batman & Wonder Woman? Even my stepparents are awesome...though one's a witch and the other's a sloth...but they're great parents and always there if I need somebody to talk to. My brother's really blossoming into a great guy...and you know that I have the most adorable nieces & nephew in all of the world. I have the most incredible network of friends & family that a man could ask for. What does this have to do with anything? They're all centered here in Slick City. The only person that I know within an 8-hour drive of Lake Tahoe...is my stepsister & her family who live in Carson and I really only see her on Christmas. Why in the hell would I want to leave all of them behind? What could possibly motivate me to just pack up and leave a perfect situation where I'm completely surrounded by family & friends? Not only that...but it took me about three seconds to accept that job in Lake Tahoe once it was offered. Even that seemed like a little longer than necessary...but why?

Is the job paying me more? Of course it is. Why would I even consider it otherwise? However, the cost of living is more there in Truckee as well...so really, I'd say it's pretty much even keel with what I'm making now (which mind you is substantially less than it was before I moved to Denver this time last year). So it's not the money that's motivating me. The job itself is exciting and the team I'll be working with seems like a great group...but it's basically just a return to what I was doing in Denver...or here in Slick City for years before that. So it's kinda the job...but then again, there are plenty of ways to make money for a hustler like me...especially one with flexible morals like myself.

Am I running away from something? Not at all. I don't have any crazy ex-girlfriends or ex-wives, baby mamas trying to get child support out of me, angry husbands looking for the man with the tattoo of a smiley face on his ass cheek, anything like that. Hell, if anything, I'm running TOWARDS responsibilities by basically being on my own...which thinking about it really isn't what I want to do...but hey, I'm a 28-year-old man now. It was bound to happen. Basically, I'm going into a new town, new job, new surroundings, alone and basically scared sh*tless because I'm leaving everything & everyone that I've ever known...and going live in the same place where the Donner Party was forced to eat each other during peak tourist season. So the question remains...

WHY AM I DOING THIS? Why does any man do anything? For the poon tang. Okay, obviously that's not the case. I was just checking to see if you were still reading. Honestly, looking at it in this logical sense so far, it really doesn't make any sense at all. And you know how I love my logical approach to most things. Listing out the Pros & Cons, countless comparisons, running over scenarios all day every day in my head to the point of tedium. That being said...I really do feel like this is the right move for me (obviously or I wouldn't be going suddenly into debt to pull this off). I don't know, maybe it's subconsciously me just going up against all my fears and proving to myself that I can be my own man...and overcome any obstacle or some crazy stuff like that. Maybe it's that I'll be living in an absolute mountain town paradise that's still very close to the ocean, casinos, my family, and everything else. Maybe it's just that I need something new & exciting to get me out of bed in the morning (though that really hasn't been much of a problem...and instead I'll be replacing it with cold lonely nights). Whatever it may be, I just have a feeling that this is the right move for me. I mean...it is paradise...as you have seen from the pictures of my limited experience...and yeah, I'll be alone to begin with...but I'm pretty good at making friends...and there'll be plenty of new people to town looking to make cool friends like me. Who knows? Maybe there's a sweet young thang out there just waiting to meet a great guy like me to try out her book that she got for Christmas last year, "The Joy of Sex...and Cooking." I don't know exactly why...but I just really feel like this can be an incredibly good thing for me.

Please don't think for a minute that this hasn't been a really tough choice for me. I really do care about each and every one of you...and that's why I pray for you every night. Oh yeah, I pray...hard. I'm going to miss you guys...but it's not like I'm going to the island of Vanuatu to be completely cut off from society (though you wouldn't know it based on how dramatic I'm making this whole thing). I'll just be in a resort town in California...and I'm sure my friends & family will come visit...as I'll visit them when time permits. In this age of technology, we can always get a hold of each other too. Facebook, telephones, text messages, web-based journals, carrier pigeons, the postal system, television, radio waves, telepathy, smoke signals, you all know how to reach me...and vice versa. And I'm still going to pray for you every night...and be there when you need somebody to talk to...because that's what friends are for.

Anyway, my dad & I leave in the morning...and it may be a few days before you hear back from me...but don't worry, I'll drive safely and I'll be sure to send a text message or something letting you all know that I made it. Just know that I'm going to miss you guys until we meet again...and don't be afraid to drop me a line & tell me about your day...and I'll tell you about my wacky, beautiful and/or sexy adventures with a backdrop as Mark Twain said, "The Fairest Picture The Whole Earth Can Afford!" Have a great weekend everybody!!!

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