Business Cards

Many people give me business cards. What I do with them is I put them into this little box which was formerly a chocolate container and now resides in my drawer.

So when do I look at these cards? Say I need a service. If your service is unique, say you sell prosthetic legs, I would call you in case my leg gets blown off by a landmine. If you specialize in shaving body hair, well, you get the picture.

The tough ones are the common ones. I have, at first estimation, over 10 cards from people selling insurance, and around the same number of people selling car parts. So in the case that I would require one of these services, I would be hard pressed to decide who to call. Most likely I would take out all the cards, put them facedown on the table and draw one.

I'm sure many other people behave as I do.

So, if you are passing out business cards, how are you gonna make me or someone like me think of your card when he needs something?

One way would be to put the picture of a sexy girl on the back of your card. Then I would keep it with me and stare at it quietly when meetings get too boring.

This would be a suitable example...

However, if you do this, how about if you give the card to a girl? You would need to put a macho guy on the back. If you put both pictures, I wouldn't be very keen on looking at the back of your card because the gayness of looking at a half-naked guy would cancel out the enjoyment of looking at a half-naked girl.

The more I look the more gay i feel...

Besides, nowadays you can't afford to make the assumption that a guy wants to look at sexy girls or a girl wants to stare at sexy guys. They might be gay or lesbian. Gotta be politically correct nowadays.

So you would need two stacks of cards, one stack with a photo of a hot girl on the back and another stack with a photo of a hot guy on the back.

The conversation would then go like this:

"Hi"

"Hi"

"What's your sexual orientation?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, I want to give you a business card"

Clearly, this method is not all that efficient.

So maybe you could put something else on the back of your card. Something useful, like a map of all the train stations in KL. Or maybe something interesting like a haiku:

A piece of paper
Business card
Call me

Fortunately(?), my company has not printed any business cards for me yet, so I do not need to worry how to get people to look at them. When I get them though, I plan to put a picture of a lovely sunset on the back. I'm sure everyone would love to look at that.